“And even when they are not,” Lambda added, a flicker of something deep in his gaze. How many years had he lived in fear? If he was not recovering from the injuries incurred with his battles against Protos Heis, he was fleeing from the humans that would chase him from whatever temporary shelter he had found. Yet here he was, a monster still save in human shape. Monsters still had limits to their lifespans, measured longer than human years but limits nonetheless.
The sound of rustling bush, turned Lambda’s head, stamping feet near imperceptively tensing his form on instinct until the creature emerged to stand by this spirit, dwarfing him with its size. Lack of any hostility allowed Lambda’s defences to lower, to resume as he had been though he’d never shifted at all. He could see the aging colours, the signs of a long life well lived.
“He is a partner to you?” Lambda queried.
Why now of all times did he have to remember that fool? Lambda felt a weight in his chest he could not properly place, a constriction that irritated him. Yet it came each time he was reminded of his own partner, of the memories of final moments and foolish words. Lambda had protested so many times yet Asbel had been far too stubborn to ever listen.
Every life has its limits.
“I see. I once considered it fortunate humans did not live so long.” It limited the damage they could do to the world. Yet he wondered if he still believed that way. “But their lives are almost pitifully short.”
There was a curiosity with which Lambda listened, with which violet eyes took in the tale of his past. It was not so uncommon a tale, not so difficult to believe that if power for it existed a world might be cleaved; that humans would have no regards to the ones hurt in the process. The bitterness, the near resentment in those words; Lambda knew them well. To be used and discarded. Though the change in voice, in the monster Orion’s demeanor; it did not go unnoticed. Lambda thought a moment he sounded like Lambda himself might have, forcing words through his host’s, but it had been many years since he’d had to share a mindspace with another.
“Did you?” Lambda asked. “Or did the humans use you?”
Lambda paused, pondered the other’s words. He was hardly apt in ‘making friends’ as the other so easily put it. Far too often humans were not worth the hassle, they sought only what they could gain from him and would be done with him. Yet again there is a pang in his chest, an odd sense of nostalgia. Why do such words bring all their faces to mind? His partner’s and the entire grouping of idiots around him? Had perhaps for that time… he considered them his own friends as well?
“It’s not so terrible having friends,” Lambda conceded. “No matter the headaches they bring with them.”
what was he to say to that? a simple nod was what he offered in return of the other’s question. fingers gently interlaced between the beasts fur, his smile small, yet endeared towards the creature of his. the companionship between both beast and tamer was obvious, green gaze returning to the other in their own way, the sharp remark of being used by humans flickering anger within his stomach, within his chest. “Humans are not the only ones who seek to benefit themselves and only themselves.” the one whom he had aided had been a half-elf. a small boy stricken with grief over the loss of a loved one who would do anything to have her back.
such comparison towards him and humans were unjustified. his head lowered in orion’s fur for naught a moment, a short, pulled breath before returning back to him. smiling warmly, hand losing it’s touch to him, gliding behind his back, head tipped to the side.
“Actually, I b-believe your first thought is the more correct one.” the glance is shot towards orion, then towards the red-head before him. “Humans live j-just the perfect amount of years. long enough to make meaningful connections, but short enough they cannot be jaded by too many things. It is, in earnest, people like us who live f-far too long.” they who grow distant to nature, to humans, to existing creatures that arise and consciousness touches minds.
it was them that held this problem. humans were not like that. his hands moved, one touching at his chest, wrapping tightly about his scarf. “We grow from them, we learn from them, we even become l-like them, yet we aren’t them.” and that was where so many got it wrong. they all seek after something unattainable. becoming human again was impossible. it’s difficult to find that balance. of being ‘too human’ or ‘too monster’ or even, ‘too spirit’. there was an edge to it, and the knife certainly stung when it stabbed, but they all usually walked away by the end of it.
as it were … sometimes emil still wished it didn’t sting quite as harshly.
“Mhmm!” emil’s smile brightened a tad, moving forward, he slipped his hand away from the scarf about his neck and offered it to the red-head. “So why don’t w-we make it official, hm?” His head tipped to the side, brightened smile near scalding in difference to the cold reception, “Since I think you and I w-would make great friends.”
green hues were bright, alighted and happy, near like a puppy. “I bet even Orion would be your friend too, though watch out,” emil waggled a finger at lambda, like a mother scolding a child, “he’s a real attention hog. Give him an inch, and he’ll take a mile.” there’s a small laugh as the whine was heard again, the big wolf-like creatures tail beginning to wag as he moved forward, nose inching against emil’s back and pressing into him. “See? Loves attention.”
Lambda silently cursed. Normally he would refute any such offer. He didn’tneed the help of others, had spent the better part of a millennia forced to survive alone without any support. To rely on another felt foolish, made him feelweak and yet it would be hours before he could walk on the steadily swelling ankle. A foolish mistake in the heat of battle; now he suffered the consequences. At least it was Emil and not certain others he could think of.
“Fine,” Lambda conceded, placing his weight on the spirit’s shoulder, in a gesture awkward enough to betray he’d never done such a thing before. “Is something wrong?” he asked, feeling foolish for needing assistance. “Now let us be out of here before any more of those infernal creatures think we attacking their nest.”
it took a bite of his tongue as the weight was awkwardly placed upon his shoulder. shifting, he moved a bit. “H-here,” he tried to move, an arm wrapping about the taller’s waist, “move your arm a bit to wrap around my shoulders, to displace the weight more evenly.” honestly, emil felt like lambda’s stubbornness was rather funny, once again reminding him of his half-elven companion from so long ago. red hair just came with the personality embedded within it, didn’t it?
“R-right, right, I know. Just don’t worry about the monsters, I’ll deal with any that show up.” it was taking a great deal to hide the entertainment from his tone, but green eyes were shining with humor. the simplicity of such actions were, perhaps degrading to his companion, but showed a trust behind it them as well which made emil’s stomach flutter with happiness. “Heh…y-you really remind me of an old friend of mine.” the words were whispered softly, the nostalgia warm to his tongue.
he merely hoped that their relationship would not take such a nose-dive as the half-elf’s had.
Lambda listened attentively, his attention gathered by the spirit’s words far more than most conversations might hold. The being is intrigued by his existence, by what task he performs, what role he fullfills, all these things that Lambda does not know for himself. Perhaps learning about him would help Lambda see his own purpose, but then what did the being know of purpose. His entire life had been spent running from those that hunted him, then simply fulfilling a promise to his partner. For what reason did he have years beyond the span of others?
There was some modicum of respect to hear how this spirit lived. The monsters that humans so easily dismissed, that were hunted and hated for simply what they were had one who existed to care for them, and oversee their creation, their existence… it was a kinder place then the one he knew.
“Interesting,” Lambda finally spoke, a faint smile curling at his lips, the only betrayal of the respect slowly growing for the other. That he spoke candidly of putting certain troublesome monsters out of their misery only helped his case. He did not sugarcoat the truth and it was a rare thing to find one who did not do so. But then this boy was not human, Lambda was the fool expecting him to adhere to his own notions of humanity. "A difficult task I imagine, monsters in the greatest amount of pain fight the hardest to live.“
"With monsters? Or have you also made friends with humans?” Lambda queried. “I can bend certain monsters to my will, but I do not share your gift for hearing their words. I suppose I have met a few humans in my time that I might consider friend. But that was many years ago now."
Emil grew quiet, only nodding to show his attention still rested upon the red-haired individual. Every fight was difficult. For those strongest monsters who were stubborn as well refused his help at first until proven he could truly be an asset. The humans .. He had known quite a few, Emil even knew their off-spring, their children, people who he dearly cared for, even as they grew and grew, and he had to slowly disappear from their lives for fear of their shouts and pointing.
For Emil knew why they did as such, and did not blame
them for their excitement. Yet he would prefer not to be
a reminder of how ‘young’ he still looked.
“Both… m-monsters live quite a bit longer than humans, I’m sure you realize, when they are w-well taken care of.” His hand made a slow motion before a pause and then a silent nod and he placed a thumb and forefinger between his lips. A sharp whistle, a call, a bounding bark, deep and loud echoed, stamping of feet and there stood a giant hound. Much taller than the blonde by this point, large enough one may consider simply riding it instead of walking along side it. “I have n-no need to control monsters. Though I’m afraid … Orion h-here won’t live for another decade or so. “ Indeed, green fur was turning white, long mane of hair speckled with grey all around his muzzle and eyes as Emil gently ran his fingers through his old friends fur.
“The humans I’ve made touch w-with … I make friends with, when I can. Yet most of th-the original friends I have made … are, as you say, many years ago by now.”
Not even Richter or Genis was alive by this point in time. A handful of his friends had forgotten him, old age cleansing their memories, or making them become so fuzzy they believed Emil to be a grandson or child of himself. It had been hard, visiting them, smiling at them as they commented about himself, as-if he wouldn’t know. Yet he had played along … the only one who ever seemed to fully remember him being —
“It’s qu-quite difficult to remember some of my friends, however sad it is. I’ve lived far over ten thousand y-years by this point. But … half of my time w-was sleeping due to my world b-breaking in two, and before that … “ His eyes grew darker, a silence flowing with inward frustration, red rimming his eyes as teeth grit. “Things … were not peaceful, and I was lead t-to believe I could help.” His voice shifted with the statements, forcing back the noise in his throat as Orion made a small whine, much unfitting for something as large as he.
These things lead to betrayal. Nightmares of the day he called out to what he thought was his friend. Hand outstretched, begging for him to realize what this power would do, the ripping apart of something so sacred, something that was his. Yet his power was taken anyway, and with a scream … A smile was quickly made, pulling back a breath in, then slowly letting it out. “It’s a cycle and a ch-chance, if you continue making friends with people who will d-die before you, but … “ He glanced up, smile brighter than before, seeming to have gotten himself under control from the earlier mention.
“ … but y-you also learn a whole lot from the new ones. You help them w-with things you’ve had to face before. It’s … always nice to have friends.”
“A spirit,” Lambda repeated the term, turning the fruit in his hands. “I am not familiar with spirits, there are no such beings where I am from. I had thought myself the only one with a life span much beyond that of humans or other living creatures."
He had not expected to be answered so directly, and Lambda might have returned the information had he a term to place to the existence that he was. But he did not. Lambda had no purpose to assign his endless years, only the knowledge that he had yet to meet any other like he. Though this boy- this spirit- was the closest.
"Monsters, is it?” Lambda queried, no judgement in his tone, merely restating the facts offered. “I find I prefer their company at times. They are more logical than humans at the very least.” Lambda could bend his own Nova monsters to his will, but he imagined that not this spirit’s purpose. He supposed he technically fell into the same realm as monsters, but this was not his world and thus he had no knowledge on the subject. “What is it you do for them?"
Emil nodded slightly, knowledge that this similar creation –though not a spirit, nor a centurion– could relate to such things. Even, if he did not quite know it yet. The years that melted off their faces, that could not be percieved, subtle hints of speech, the way one looked to solving a problem ( permanent solutions; no-matter how bad the final outcome ) would take and slowly shift along the way.
The spirit was very familiar with such things by now.
”Mhmm,“ he agreed with the other along the lines of monsters. Awaiting for his thoughts to fully come to a halt before answering any queries given to him. A little pause for thought … ”I … protect them.“ His voice did not catch in his throat as he thought long and hard about the things he ‘did’ for them. ”As Ratatosk, I-I am the 'Lord of all Monsters’. So … i-it’s my responsibilities to c-care for them.“
Yet he gave the name 'Emil’. He still preferred thinking that there was subtle differences –which their were– that could not slip so easily into his conversation ( or thoughts ) despite knowing it to be untrue. He heard Ratatosk’s thoughts as his own and did not feel any regret in such actions, even when he took them.
”I h-help create them, my existence here … I can t-talk to them, get their names, be with them.“ He did not know how else to describe this task ( job ) to someone outside of his mind, outside and unknowing to the way of the world around them worked. ”That is w-why I leave my world. Disturbances with e-extremely strong beasts rip th-through the threads of the worlds, calling me to them, t-to either help them, or …“
His voice slowly lowered, pain painting across his face. ”…I c-can hear anything a monster says … and understand them … i-if what they say is too harsh, unable to forgive, e-even when I try to give them time, prove to them … I put the p-pain to an end.“ Like the blood-stained hand of a G O D, a humanoid spirit which watched things he called friends build and crumble around him for centuries.
Yet he smiled on, still.
”Though it’s a-all fine. I made s-several good friends in my lifetimes …“
Lambda held the fruit in his hand, intrigued, or perhaps on some level admiring the work. He had never seen any make such artistry of their food before, though the explanation offered granted the insight needed, and a faint smile pulled at his lips.
“An interesting way to ease your boredom, but you’ve clearly had the time to develop some skill with it.” This fruit was not the work of someone who had only just picked up a knife.
“You say you’ve lived a long time, yet you do not look so old by human years.” The fruit momentarily still clasped in his grip, the realization that struck him made sense of a great many things. “You are not human either, are you?"
Emil hummed quietly, pleased his meaning somehow seemed to make sense to the other before him. Yes, this other was similar to himself, was he not?
[ not at all ]
”An a-awful lot … yes.“
He would not deny the time he had spent, would not deny the years he had practiced carving with a knife before his slumber for thousands of years. It was an odd thing to look back on and realize –what once had been pure talent– was actually skill, grinded down through cuts and scrapes upon fingers.
His smile grew almost bittersweet. Had he been found out, then? ”Hehe…I am a spirit, th-the spirit in charge of the g-great kharlan tree, t-to be exact.“ He had not exactly hidden such a story from others, yet he did not wish for such a story to be offered so naively. ”Or, I w-was … until it was s-split in half. Now I s-simply keep the balance of monsters.“ This person reminded him of one other, or perhaps a better way to say it was: reminded him of himself.
Lambda stared at the proffered fruit, not having expected it to be offered. Its skin had been removed and the flesh carved into a manner of flower. It resembled more artistry than sustenance, and Lambda had seen for himself what time it had taken to carve.
“It resembles what humans might carve from wood to decorate their homes,” he noted. “Why put in so much effort, when you only intend to consume it?"
His lips parted, eased smile to the other who seemed rather … confused. The spurt of a giggle sliding from the back of his throat escaping in a soft laugh. Truly, why did the blonde put so much work into something so quaint? It was a strange thing, but … ”Because,“ he answered simply,
”When I’m c-cooking, or even just making a little s-something out of this apple … it calms me down, gives me s-something to do.“
Busy hands kept from idle thoughts. ( though he won’t explain the thoughts that plague dreams or ideas ) ”To me … it comes n-naturally. Or I guess I should s-say, I’ve been alive for so long, it’s second nature b-by now.“
There was a practiced ease to his movements that told Lambda it not the first time he had performed such a task. The fruit looked ripe and well picked, and his own vessel rather inconveniently chose that moment to remind him it needed sustenance as well.
“Where did you find that?"
”Hehe, I usually c-carry some type of fruit on me.“
Emil covered his mouth, a giggle held back as he finished up with creating his ‘masterpiece’, and handed it over instead of a new apple. ”Here y-you go.“ Craftmanship in fruit, a delicate rose carved into the meat, intricate shavings of the apple’s thin protective layer decorating the outside as-if it had been painted upon.
“Surely there must be something better with which to ease your boredom than that.” Such strange creatures humans were at times. Though Lambda was perhaps not one to talk, easing his own boredom by watching them.
"N-nope!“
You mean spirit, but Emil was close enough to a human for the mistake to be looked over by most eyes. His fingers working carefully over a piece of fruit with a knife … ”This is t-typically what I do when I’m bored.“
