His thoughts were sometimes worse than he could ever imagine. He could attempt to fight them but it left him to a struggle that forced him to lose the air that his lungs needed so much. It threw him into anxiety, into fear… The nightmare of last night had thrown him over the edge, clutching ever so tightly to the pillow for comfort.
Eyes were puffy from the tears, body tense as it was curled up into a ball. He didn’t care for hearing the soft knock, didn’t care to budge at the soft voice that escaped into the air. He didn’t hear the other’s question but he had muttered the same phrase over and over again like a broken record.
“I don’t want to live anymore. “
The words were whispered, mumbled to the pillow that covered his splotchy face. Teeth bit against his tongue, hard against the soft tissue… “This world is already HELL so th-the after life can’t be as bad…”
what is one to say? emil’s thoughts ran wild, the hesitation in his figure to even enter the room showed his wish to avoid such a scene. yet, with a swallow and a slow breath, released from an anxious stomach, he moved closer. weight spreading out upon the bed, his hand resting gingerly against the other’s shoulder.
“ shhh… ” his words are quiet, soothing. “ you don’t m-mean that. Think of everyone you’ve encountered … everyone wh-who cares about you, that looks up to you. do you really want to leave them behind? ” hands are gentle, moving to press warm palms, massaging the other’s shoulder gently.
he’s the careful type. he does not like conflict between two opposing factions, yet he is used to it. there is a difference to such a thing, and accepting it as ‘the only way’. the pain of living … the ripping of one’s stomach to simply be alive was something he was very much used to. one he would never wish upon another living being.
“ conner, can you hear me? ”
shifting forward, emil’s hands moved to gently roll the other a bit forward. strength of a thousand year old summon spirit doing it quite easily, yet he would not admit to the ‘ease’. “ conner mundy, sniper of the red team, do you hear me? Is this what y-you really want? To give up on everyone who cares for you? To l-leave them behind? ” because emil could not help him if that was what he truly wanted.
though emil had the sinking suspicion that truly was not what he wished.
redeyedguardian-old: Ratatosk flopped heavily onto the couch before grumbling about how much he hates Idiots What he forgot to take into consideration was that he wasn't the only one in the room.
A soft snicker of laughter spilled between lips as a grin worked it’s way up. Leaning back upon arms, a mop of blonde hair fell backwards, ahoge falling with it as eyes looked coyly at the obviously frustrated spirit. “Hehe .. th-that’s not nice to say, Ratatosk. What’s g-got you so mad, this time?”
Emil doubted whoever this person was who annoyed Ratatosk was, was truly an idiot. Though, he might as well hear Ratatosk out and try to help him through this, yes?
What’s this kid’s problem, you almost wanted to ask aloud; yet the words would not roll off your tongue. Busy, the city was naturally so, you ought to of expected the disruption in your path. The blond’s smaller figure was not enough to shove you aside, but it certainly was enough to knock askew the collection of tomes you held in your arms—a couple of which tumbled from your grasp with the jolt. Had you been more the outspoken sort, oh he would of received more than an agitated grumble under your breath. No, Emil would be too lucky the sort to garner a verbal lashing.
Green eyes watch, see an expression of disdain, grumbling, his head ducks quickly. Apologies lace his tongue as a mantra, his body bending to pick up baubles, voice (too loud) in your ears telling you of who this person was. Things that the summon spirit would have no recollection for. So it is like this as arms are quick to offer themselves to carry that which appears too much.
"P-please, let me help! As my apology … “
His gaze barely met to their mouth before lowering again. He did not meet this persons gaze.
There is silence as the god kneels, staring at a wolf cub. A pale hand reaches out to turn the frightened creature’s head, autumn star eyes dimming at the sight of a gash across its throat. It was unclear whether it was the work or a poacher or another of the beasts that roamed this world, though it mattered not. Neither was left in the close vicinity as he travels had brought him here in happenstance. And as a god of healing, he couldn’t very well leave the poor beast to slowly bleed out, now could he?
“Quiet now,” he cooed as the pup barked in its newfound strength as magic poured from the god’s fingers. Once the healing was done, and the injury left as no more than a thin red scratch, he pulled his hand back. The pup, however, still frightened, lashed out, small teeth tearing against digits before they could be snatched away.
“Ack—! Some payback. See if I help your help your kind again—” Injured hand was waved about in the air as the skin repaired itself. Though he could heal himself at ease if his wounds were not too dire, it didn’t take from the fact that had smarted.
Emil had been quiet, his voice unheard from those who traversed the wilds without his say-so, without his knowledge. Green gaze one of sadness, dissapointment, as he listened to cries of creatures ( game they call it. yet to play with life is no game) fall from their graces and collapse in piles of blood or muck, laughter heard amongst those hunters, slinging skins over shoulders, leaving behind that which would not profit them.
So, it was with a heavy heart and sullen feet that the spirit had begun his walk forward, retracing steps, large creature following behind faithfully ( orion always accompanied him when he was home, the poor wolf would never do anything but ). His stomach dropping to his toes as he ushered the older beast to the side, it’s green fur and large proportions difficult to hide within the confines of a forest, yet it was manageable, with back pressed against the trunk, deep breaths swallowed in his throat, he listened.
Soft squeaking, attempts of speech, of warning to something that would kill him.
Or, so it thought.
The sound grew more solid, it’s low noises, whining, whimpering, turning more. It surprised as a sharp snap was heard, cursing the wolf for it’s animalistic behavior as it rushed beyond, tearing away, yet stopping at the edge of the clearing, staring at Emil curiously.
Noise, head tilting, tail shifting, Emil slowly lowered on his haunches, offering a hand, despite the low gutteral noise made within his own wolves throat. A sniff forward, the creature gliding closer to the spirit who made no motion to disturb before it moved, jumping closer, a purr of comfort.
❝ P r ot e c t ❞
"Of course…“
He gave a light smile, it’s head pressing tightly into the blond’s bossom, not even going to glance over at what had been the reasoning for the wolf’s survival until it gave a low growl, his own beast following with barred teeth and green eyes jumped. Mouth open, attempting to form words awkwardly before he swallowed audibly, small fox within his grip as he closed his eyes.
There was a sharp, unmanly, squeak that peeped between blonde lips at the kiss. Cheeks flushing a cherry color as emerald optics stared at the anon with a confused air.
The muffled gasp was all sound that could be uttered, spinning weapon in hand opposite direction in attempt to avoid maiming the blond. Momentum halted and reversed through the lieutenant off balance, stumbling to a halt. Dumbfounded was the stare given, incredulity fighting sheer annoyance for domination.
“What are you doing? Have you any idea the harm a Nova monster could do in the city? The protection of a beast so wretched—” Pause in speech was taken to spin blades again, parrying attack and knocking monster back. “—should hardly be the concern of anyone. The people should, or are you so concerned you’ve yet to see where you are?”
Emil had to be careful, back now to the beast, listening intently, trying to differ the sound of the young militia’s orders in comparison to the monster. Gliding upon his heels, he shifted across sands, around the attack, going directly for the man who parried it’s attack.
“Then p-protect the citizens!” Emil pleaded hoping that his idea would be taken into consideration in comparison to the alternative. “I can t-tame monsters! If you just give me a l-little bit of time, I can–”
Another crash ; they didn't have that time. Emil knew it, but he shot a plea-filled glance back to the man there before a sharp whistle extracted from pursed lips, calling the big wolf’s attention. Large body, larger than the blonde, just taller than Emil, green body turning and coming towards him. A flick of fingers, twirling and Orion gave a howl, trying to draw attention away from the people, away from everyone, no matter how successful he may be.
Emil sprinted off, his eyes focused on the Nova beast's negativity. The hatred swimming off the creature making the blonde’s head dizzy. “Come on … I’ve gotta … be able to do this. I h-have this for a reason."
He was having a hard time, even as he mumbled to himself,
monsters shouts of squishy things, getting in his way, causing a flinch from the blonde, yet he did not deter. Instead he followed with his own sword-swipes as well. They were not effective, for what they were. The motions meant to stun creatures, not destroy. Trying to, begging to, become more, protect all. Show creatures … maybe this wasn’t the way to be.
But how could he do it … with a pounding head full of the monsters dialect?
He swayed, unable to catch a movement from the creature, claws scraping down his side, leaving a gash along his side, pushing him off to the side.
redeyedguardian-old:
Anonymous:
